A Letter from the Frontline of a Dissertation

September 25, 2017 by Cazey Williams in Humor, life lessons, Life In Your 20's, Cazey's Column

The days are growing shorter again. Another winter is approaching. My comrades say each year only gets darker. They’ve begun to ration our coffee intake. Something about our pulses being too fast and causing too much anxiety. I’ve tried to steal some and hide it with my stash of dark chocolate, shot glasses, and dreams and despair.

I don’t know when I’ll make it home again. When I signed on for this, they told me it would be four years. In and out. It seemed so doable. Now, I’m not so sure. August marked the end of the fourth year. There was no celebration. I did take a week of personal time, but I felt judged for leaving my desk.

When Do You Finish Your PhD?

April 04, 2016 by Cazey Williams in Cazey's Column, Humor, Life In Your 20's, life lessons

Dear everyone,

I know what you're about to ask. We saw each other last week, or we saw each other last year. You're going to ask how am I, or tell me happy Easter or say, "Give me a hug!" and then you're going to ask, "When do you graduate?"

You don't mean undergrad. You want to know when I'm going to finish my PhD. And maybe you'll even say it that way.

You'll ask this question before you even ask what I'm studying. You all know I'm in a PhD program via the family telephone tree, Facebook, and/or the Christmas newsletters from grandma. And maybe you know what I'm studying, but you're most interested in when will I be done.

Sh*t Non-Academics Say

August 19, 2015 by Cazey Williams in Cazey's Column, Life In Your 20's, life lessons, Young Professionalism

As a PhD student in my third year, I am constantly challenged with inane questions that I really don't have time to answer on top of figuring out why numbers do crazy things and what does my adviser mean by that comment on my fourth draft. With the help of some fellow grad school friends, I compiled a Q&A for those not in grad school.

How long is your program? With a grain of salt, a master's degrees takes two years, and a PhD takes an additional three years. With that said, a degree typically culminates in this thing called a dissertation, which does not have a set timeline. It's like asking, "How long do you think my child will live?" five minutes after it has emerged from the womb. The answer: Indefinitely. Except, in the case of the PhD, you want that critter to die ASAP.

To Catch an Adviser

August 18, 2015 by Cazey Williams in Cazey's Column, Humor, life lessons

When I got into my PhD program, I told myself I would be in and out in four years. No clowning around; I wanted to be in Africa by the end of 2017.

I soon learned that the average sentence for a PhD student in my program is five years. That wasn't going to do. I asked around: How can one escape sooner?

Image courtesy of zole4 at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Height of Incompetence

April 27, 2015 by Cazey Williams in Cazey's Column, Humor, Life In Your 20's, life lessons, Work

I tend not to write about too many grad school experiences, but this just happened, and I need to vent.

Over winter break, I received my grades for the fall semester. I was not expecting straight As because let me tell you, last semester was like a Sarah Paulson character on American Horror Story aka a struggle bus that kept on rolling. However, straight As is what I got - except for a pesky B in a seminar class. Now this class meets every other week, and we basically show up, shut up, and pretend to listen. Aka I doodle and Snapchat on my phone; sometimes I draft a blog. But we sign the attendance sheet and we get an A.

Sore Subjects Over the Holidays

December 19, 2014 by Cazey Williams in Cazey's Column, Leisure, Life In Your 20's, Tweets and Mascara, Uncategorized

I hate to be one of those people who says, "Let's not talk about it," because really, I only want to talk about it more after you say that. But here is a list of things I'd rather not discuss while reuniting with family and friends over the holidays.

Grad school. Like, OMG, number one thing people want to ask me about. I know they say grad school is supposed to break you before it does - well, whatever it's $uppo$ed to do - but I didn't know it would have me questioning what is a truly healthy amount of apathy, dissatisfaction (does that negate the apathy), and why the heck don't I just teach elementary school art???

Hillary. Yes, she's going to run. And if she's not, is the fighting worth it? Pass the pie.