Airplane boarding is a caste system. I’m not just talking first class vs. economy seating. There’s priority boarding, too. If you’re one of those people who gets called to board first, you should be embarrassed: This means you’re either too rich (or you prioritize your spending in ways I don’t) or you’re a workaholic because you have too many frequent flyer miles - and probably too many emails. (I should disclose here that I hope to one day have those frequent flyer miles.)

Also, what is this nonsense where we have to stand in two separate lines? First class already boarded, but I still have to stand on a different square of carpet than them?