29 and Ticking

April 24, 2019 by astoldoverbrunch in Guest Post, Dating, Life In Your 20's, life lessons

I’m a 29-year-old bachelorette who’s not ready to get married yet. Not wanting to be someone’s wife can be problematic in a world that often defines a woman’s status by a ring on her finger and having a serious significant other in the picture. God forbid you be single, whole on your own, and out here living your best life… you may worry or threaten people with your singleness and bachelorette lifestyle.

This is not to mention the concerns and pressures from different family members, friends, and even acquaintances who often ask, “Why are you still single?”

“Why do you care?” is what I’d like to know. The pressure. The questions. The comparisons.

Everything That Went Wrong in the $30 Airbnb

June 19, 2018 by Cazey Williams in Cazey's Column, Life In Your 20's, life lessons

A couple of weeks ago, my friend invited me to her wedding. I brought my roommate Katherine as my plus one and booked an Airbnb for us.

I didn’t spend too much time on the selection. We wouldn’t be at the place long, just to change before the wedding and to sleep afterward. There also weren’t a ton of selections in the area, but I found a suburban two-storey bungalow for $50. The rental was a private room, meaning the host would be home, but that was fine; I’ve done that before in the States and abroad. Plus, I had a $20 voucher I could apply to make the entire rental $30. Amazing!

I forgot about the Airbnb almost entirely until a week before the wedding when “Mr. Xi” emailed confirming my arrival and informing me he would be out of town. “I’ll leave key in lockbox,” he wrote. “The code is 7133. Leave the key there when you go out.”

Am I Actually Invited To Your Wedding?

November 20, 2017 by Cazey Williams in Cazey's Column, Dating, Humor, Life In Your 20's, life lessons

Last month I received an invitation to my friend's wedding. This came as a surprise since, even though we were the best of friends when drunk while freshman year, the last time we caught up was at dinner and we finished and paid for our meal in under an hour. I walked away thinking, "We are not the same friends anymore."

When I saw my friend was engaged, I happily clicked like and wrote congrats with three exclamation points. My excitement for him was genuine. But after that dinner, I felt pretty sure I would not be invited to the wedding. Which not a big deal. At our dinner, I discovered the wedding date coincided with a project proposal I had due (grad school problems), and I even mentioned this to my friend.

Cue me opening letter and squealing (I think I did make some animalistic noise) that I was invited. And not just that - the invitation read "Mr. Cazey Williams + Guest."

Don't Get Married; Get a Blender

June 30, 2016 by Cazey Williams in Cazey's Column, Humor, Life In Your 20's, life lessons

My parents’ friend’s son is getting married this month. I knew about his engagement before my parents because I use Facebook. I assumed I’d be invited because we’re childhood besties. I mean, we haven’t played tag since fifth grade, but what’s a decade and a half?

I liked the ring photo. Good work, dude. (He proposed while they were “vacationing” in Antigua. I call that a pre-honeymoon.)

Last month I discovered I was invited – but not as myself. I was invited as my parents’ plus one.

Here I was, worried I wouldn’t get a plus one, never worried I would actually be someone else’s plus one, let alone my parents’.

Wine, Wings, and Eviction

June 22, 2016 by Cazey Williams in Life In Your 20's, life lessons, Humor, Cazey's Column

When I asked my friend Meredith to accompany me to my friend's wedding, I knew it'd be fun, but I also felt bad since Meredith lived two hours further away from the wedding than I did. So when she said her only request in all this was that we get "sticky nugs" at Billy Jack's, I had to agree. The wedding was taking place in our college town of Harrisonburg, VA, and Billy Jack's was the locals wings shack.

We Uber'd to the wedding, but soon learned that was not a feasible exit strategy (see previous blog post), so we took a shuttle back to the wedding hotel. I call it the wedding hotel because that's where the bride, groom, and all the guests were supposed to be staying, but when I booked us a room there, Meredith freaked out the price and insisted we could find a cheaper hotel. Which we did. But that meant we took a shuttle back to a hotel we weren't staying at.

Meredith announced to the two other passengers in the shuttle, "Cazey, I'm just going to run into the lobby and use the bathroom and then we can head downtown. Is that okay?"

The Hypothetical Wedding Crashers

May 16, 2016 by Cazey Williams in Humor, Cazey's Column, life lessons, Life In Your 20's

January to March is wedding promo season. No one actually gets married unless you’re having a destination wedding and trying not to pay for your cousin and his/her spouse’s plates. But look to social media for reposts of engagement photos (“#ThrowbackThursday to the time we paid a stranger to photograph us in a backyard we don’t own”), bridesmaid acceptances (“of course I’ll drop a grand on a dress and a bachelorette weekend since we sat together in high school chemistry”), and save-the-dates (“I could just send out the actual invitations, but instead let’s keep the postmen employed”).

The last point is what brings me to today’s narrative. A friend who I haven’t seen since college (so three years ago—actually maybe we saw each other at homecoming two years ago?) is getting married. This week she sent out her save-the-dates. I didn’t get one.

Of course, it’s only day two. Maybe it’s still in transit somewhere between Michigan and Virginia. But I’m beginning to accept that Instagram likes and friendship via bonding over our inability to play beer pong six years ago does not ensure a ticket to an open bar (that’s what nuptials are if you were wondering).

No Plus One At Your Wedding? You May Be Minus One

May 02, 2016 by Cazey Williams in life lessons, Dating, Cazey's Column, Life In Your 20's, Humor

For the past year I’ve watched several acquaintances become engaged, but no close friends. On social media I scroll past bridal parties, wedding photos, and honeymoon humble-brags, but of people whose vows I would never expect to be invited to. I began to question how I had chosen my friends so well that none of them has given into the Power of the One True Ring. Kudos to me, right?

But I've also been disappointed to not be invited to any open bars and/or weekend getaways to Nashville (where every soon-to-be spouse seems to congregate with their besties). How am I supposed to feel like my life is a 30-minute weekly sitcom if I’m not invited to any of my peers’ weddings? Wedding reception episodes always happen by season two a la “New Girl,” “Broad City,” “As Told Over Brunch,” etc.

The closest I came to a wedding invitation was my childhood friend’s engagement. The friend asked for my address soon after, and I kept my calendar open only to realize as the months ticked down that my invitation was not coming. This did not offend me. The last time we hung out was high school and the last time we spoke was eighteen months prior to being asked for my address.

First Comes Marriage - or Maybe a House

August 23, 2015 by Cazey Williams in Cazey's Column, Life In Your 20's, life lessons

In the last two months, two friends have bought houses - you know, four-walled structures with backyards and driveways - and a third bought a condo. None of them are married - in fact, they're all single. None of them have had their job for longer than two years. And they are all my age.

Can we dwell? They are my age.

Why is "Wedding Season" in the Summer?

August 11, 2015 by Sara Woznicki in Humor, Leisure, Life In Your 20's, Dating, life lessons, Sara's Column, Tweets and Mascara

My uncle got married this summer. Last summer, my two cousins both got married during the summer months. As did my childhood best friend. In previous summers, my other two cousins got married in the summer. As did what I estimate millions of people, because summer is "wedding season."

I took to the streets with my journalistic integrity and surveyed at least one person about why people all get married in the summer. The answers I got were because that's when people plan and expect to travel, because more people are off during the summer (teachers, it's just teachers and their students) and that people don't want to get married when it's cold.

The Top 4 Truths About Engagement

April 28, 2015 by astoldoverbrunch in Guest Post, Life In Your 20's, life lessons

By Ginny Latham*

It’s 1:45 on a Monday; my Chipotle lunch is begging me not to recommence my workday, so I wander over to peruse my various social media channels when all of a sudden it shows up. The huge ring and even bigger smile of my neighbor in 2nd grade who moved to California and went through a (longer than acceptable) Ricky Martin phase is engaged.

Lucky for us, social media allows us to stay in touch with our closest friends/everyone we've ever encountered. Thanks to the “Facebook friend request everyone I meet” phase in high school, or even better – the summer-before-freshman-year desperate Facebook rampage to find a college roommate – we truly can stay in touch with everyone.