Disclaimer: Graphic bodily processes mentioned below.

On a recent Saturday I awoke in the middle of the night and realized something was wrong. I hadn’t felt this way since high school. Hours later, I vomited. So began a day of delirium.

7 AM. *throws up* Okay, three hours until yoga class. I can sleep this off until then. There is so much I need to accomplish today.

8:10 AM. *throws up again* We’re not joking around here. I think I’m sick.

8:55 AM. Why don’t we have toilets where we can lay down while using them? I don’t have the energy to sit up.