Sorry for the Spam

Last night, I was pretty excited to try out this new website I had found that marketing itself as a place for people to communicate with others that share their interests on Twitter. In my head, that meant it was a forum for tweet chats, so I signed myself up and then went ahead with selecting industries and topics I was interested in. The next step seemed a little blurry, as I didn't fully understand where exactly the tweet chats were going to occur, but I allowed access to my Twitter account regardless, because that would make sense for them to have so I could tweet to all of the accounts of similar interests, right?

Wrong. So, so, so wrong. And if it hadn't been for my favorite internet troll of a friend, I would never have known what a pile of wrong I had stepped in. Here is what my twitter feed looked like to me yesterday:

And here (apparently) is what my new forum posted on my behalf:

Great. I accidentally signed myself up for a spam followers generator. And you know what's even more saddening: it promoted that I got 882 new followers, and I didn't even get any new followers, nor do I even have 800 followers.

If this all isn't embarrassing enough, what's worse is that I can't even delete them because I CAN'T EVEN SEE THEM. My only course of action, now, has been to delete them out of my access list. So the lesson here is clearly don't give out Twitter access to just anyone, even if they make it sound like a nice place to go and discuss your feelings, because they may be tweeting out creepy spam to all your friends.

Overcoming FOMO

In college one of my favorite articles I read was about FOMO, the fear of missing out. It's basically a feeling you get when you go on social media and see that all your friends are having so much fun and you weren't there. There's all these studies out now that back FOMO up, saying that social media and the Internet is causing kids to feel higher levels of anxiety (click here for an article that backs me up. and another just to up my credibility). Why I liked this article so much- and literally printed it out so I could always have it- was because I could deeply relate to it. I always felt like I was missing out. If I was invited to 2 different events at the same time, I would pick one and then sit on Facebook or Twitter the day after, waiting to see pictures and and status updates about the party I missed out on. I consistently felt like the other option was better no matter how much fun I'd have the night before, I'd always feel like I should have done the other thing.

Making decisions would be stressful, and then I'd have anxiety about it after, knowing that I'd be able to see if the other people had fun. One night I wanted to unwind after a rough week and relax, so I made no plans and decided to stay in. However, it was nowhere near relaxing. I kept checking in on social media and seeing how much fun people were having and I wondered why I ever decided not to go out. So much for relaxing...

Over time I built it up in my head that social media was this huge problem and that I'd never want to work in it because it is an evil empire. After getting a job where my title is literally "Social Media Specialist", I realize how wrong I was about social media.

Social media was never the problem. The problem was all in my head. This is how I needed to think about it: when people go out and take pictures, they hardly ever take sad ones and post them on Facebook. Even more, some of the best nights I've ever had were ones where we didn't take any pictures because we were literally having too much fun to do so.

Consider that people that tweet excessively are probably not doing anything else that would distract them from tweeting, while you're out there having a blast.

And lastly, who the hell cares? Remember that. If I had a great time, why should I be concerned if someone else had more fun? Why can't we all just have fun and not attempt to quantify it and compare it?

Social media is a great way to connect friends and families, consumers and companies, and strangers with similar interests. Just because someone tweets more than you, is tagged in more pictures than you, has a higher Klout score, or is Vine famous does not intrinsically mean that they are living vastly more exciting lived than you. It's just means they waste a lot more time trying to document their lives, while you're out there living it.

How to Afford the Real World

Disclaimer: I am not a finance person. I once took a personal finance class and sometimes did some of the homework for it. I grew up upper-middle class and went to college with an extremely generous backing from my parents. Essentially all I had to afford was shampoo and conditioner. So now that college is over, I am expected to be a self-sufficient person. Here's what I've learned so far in regards to transitioning off your parents budget onto your own:

Another Disclaimer: When I say "my own budget", that excludes my cell phone bill and car insurance, as well as a send-home traffic violation ticket, which my parents are still paying for.

Realize whose budget you're now on. When I was on my parents budget, I was used to going out to dinner and ordering whatever I wanted. Now I realize that that steak dinners are only for people that make real money.

Get in the right mindset. I constantly tell myself I am poor. If you remind yourself everyday that you don't have money, you'll end up saving A LOT of money. Even now, when my funds are not terrifyingly low, I still remind myself that I don't have a seemingly endless supply of money anymore.

Prioritize. This is the section that I take most seriously. Know what is worth spending your money on (think back to my earlier blog about being thoughtful with who to share your money with too). While I can tell you that giving priorities to your pennies is essential, I am giving out no advice on what those priorities should be, as mine are questionable. My priorities lie in consumption, fun, and being young. I spend no money on clothes or shoes because my priority is having money to go out rather than to have going out clothes without money to go out with.

Just don't buy things. This may seem obvious, but it's how I spent so little money when I moved out. I just didn't buy things. My headboard is from my parents. My mattress was a gift from my parents when they thought my free mattress was inhumane to make me sleep on. My bookshelf and cd rack is from the side of the road. And I haven't invested a penny past that for things that normal people may see as essential for a room, such as a dresser or night tables. One day, when the plastic containers and crates holding my clothes gets too tacky for me, then I might invest in real people furniture.

Coupons and happy hours (aka get a plan). I got myself a Kroger's card and now base all my purchasing decisions off of what Kroger puts on sale that week. My friends and I plan to go places where drinks are cheap at certain times on certain days. That way I can indulge, yet still remind myself that I am a young struggling professional now.

Enjoy it. Struggling isn't actually bad. We're all there, or have been. My roommates are in the same boat, and we paddle along with each other. We help each other when one is having a better week than the other and laugh about it when we're eating frozen pizza together. It's a bonding experience that reminds us we are independent young people making it work. It's fun to know I fund my own life and its exciting watching money going in and out of my account.

Life is exhilarating out here in the real world, even when it means your budget is the smallest it has ever been before.

Debatably Narcissistic

Today I decided I was going to anti-up on my About page, as currently I have nothing more than an artsy picture of myself with a bio reading, “Im just a girl trying to make it in summer heat of Virginia.” Yes, my bio is only one sentence and features a lack of appropriate punctuation. So I decided to invest myself in writing this witty little ditty about myself so that people will be enthralled with the person behind the blog. Then I started to feel plagued with narcissism. I wanted to throw in my college GPA so everyone takes me seriously. I wanted to throw in all the honors I won and namedrop all the places that published me.

I seriously began to go on and on about how great I am, how funny I am, etc. Then I woke up and realized I sounded like a narcissistic prick.  So I deleted the whole bit and decided that until I get down off my throne of narcissism, my bio shall remain only one sentence.

My short stint with rewriting my bio got me thinking though: Is social media just making people more narcissistic?

I grew up with a pathetically low amount of self-esteem, yet now I find myself thinking that people will want to know my day-to-day lessons as a young adult just breaking into the workforce. Even more, I actually think that people should WANT to follow me on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, my blog, and hell, people probably even want to email me. I chuckle at myself when I tweet something funny, and get an exorbitant boost of self-esteem whenever someone clicks that little star of favoritism on one of my tweets.

To answer my own question, maybe social media has made me feel more important, like my thoughts are more relevant, and that people might actually want to hear from me.  But, on the same token, maybe that’s not a bad thing.

Here’s me when I used to be a boy.

Just kidding, I didn’t used to be a boy, but I sure did look like one!

So yes, social media makes me feel a little more relevant and connected, but don’t you think after having this bowl cut, I deserve a bit of extra attention?

Domain Names are Changing!

Yesterday I got my first opportunity to blog for the firm I work for about domain names! Domain name options are expanding, so be ready for lots of internet changes coming up. Read my article to learn more about all the changes, as well as the implications the changes will have on domain name strategies: http://goo.gl/y4PZiL

Let me know what you think about ICANN's changes and how you think it will change the internet atmosphere.

I'll Go, But Not Quietly

A few days ago, I hit my last straw with my bank. I've been banking with them since high school, and have had it with their lackluster customer service and mismanagement of my account. I have gone in person to speak with someone, only to be turned away. I've called the hotline, only to be hurried off the phone without my problems resolved. So I took my message to the streets.

I tweeted: "Bank of America blows. I'm going on record to say they consistently, bar none, have the worst customer service available. #salty"

 I did this for lots of reasons. I did this because I thought of the Dell Hell blog that caused Dell to reinvent its customer service. I did it to inspire change within the organization. I did it to make them take customers complaints seriously. I did it so they stopped thinking they could walk over me. I did it to warn my followers that if they want a pleasant banking experience, they should go somewhere else. And lastly, I did it because I was alone in my office and needed to complain to someone.

My dad then called me up to inform me that I am petty, immature and that "as someone that's in the business of social media, you should know the limits of what should be tweeted."

I took it all in and contemplated it. Among the tweets up for debate:

• that I watch Kelly and Michael at work
• That I am glad the workweek is ending #TGIF
• And mainly about how I am a disgruntled bank consumer

If my boss knows I watch Kelly and Michael at work, what's the problem with saying that it makes me happy to do so?

My boss also says she's glad for the weekend. She's used the #TGIF hashtag before. And not to compare, but she referred to Beyonce as porn, so how is that any less petty to put on social media?

And lastly, if I tell people in person to bank elsewhere, what's the difference between telling my online network? I literally work my bank into conversations in order to warn people, so why should I not tell people online about my feelings? Is it rude? Potentially. I tried other means to talk to the bank, but bar none the most immediate response I got was via my tweet. They even followed up with me days later via twitter. When I call them or go see them in person, I don't even get that kind of compassion. Clearly, tweeting to them helped on some level.

46% of people look online before making purchasing decisions, so isn't it in the best nature of helping others to warn people of a company I strongly suggest avoiding? If this bank won't change, shouldn't I tell people to be wary? I gave them ample chances to make me a happy customer, but they didn't, so now they should live with the repercussions. 

My sister tells me just to leave if its so bad. I'm going to leave the bank eventually, but why do I have to go quietly and let people blindly decide to go there without at least some chance of knowing how they will be treated?

Is tweeting badly about a company a bad thing? Or am I right in wanting to bring to light customer service that is not up to my standards? Is it justified because it's they only avenue that they took me seriously on?

Let's get some dialogue going about this below.

Sometimes, there CAN be such a thing as too much enthusiasm

So now that I'm running my own independent beauty consulting business, I decided that I needed to back it up with social media. This was a natural inclination, as social media is my daytime profession. Plus, I had it worked out in my head that the more I sold online, the less legwork I would need to do in real life. So along came my alter ego, Sara at Mary Kay. She has this fancy little fan Facebook page and a Twitter handle to match. I went through and invited my friends to like the page and gave about a 10 second thought as to what to schedule onto it. Then I turned my sights onto my new Twitter persona.

I really saw Twitter as my outlet to new fans for many reasons, such as Twitter's longer history of hash tags, trending topics, and a general attitude that its not creepy to follow strangers. So I went Twitter-crazy. @SaraAtMaryKay went through and followed almost anyone talking about makeup, Mary Kay, skincare, or even just in the geographic vicinity of Richmond. Then she started retweeting like it was going out of style. Just to top it all off, she started mentioning lots of people that she whimsically decided would be interested.

Then Twitter blocked @SaraAtMaryKay.

Down went my non de plum. Thankfully, it only lasted for about an hour, and @SaraAtMaryKay was back in the game.

One may assume that after being blocked for being considered spammy, you would breathe and reign in the crazy Twitter horses. Nay. @SaraAtMaryKay continued to trek on. I had that account go through my real account and follow everyone that I thought would want to follow my makeup persona. I did a bit more retweeting, and just like that I was suspended (which means that you have to sit through several days of Twitter jail while they decide if you are allowed back on the site).

I was livid. How was I going to launch this great new endeavor if Twitter keeps taking me offline? So what if I condensed an entire day of reasonable Twitter engagement into an hour? So what if I spent my lunch hour blowing up the feeds of my followers?

Then it hit me.

Twitter is about people. No one wants to see me throwing myself at them. It was basically Twitter trying to tell me I was being desperate and needed to get my shit together. Basically I was being that drunk girl at a bar that just won't shut up so that everyone else can enjoy a bit of discourse. She just keeps blurting things out and hoping someone latches on to at least something she said, when in reality they're just rolling their eyes.

Sometimes, there can be too much enthusiasm. It's great that I wanted everyone to know I was selling markup, but I needed to direct all that emotion into digestible packages. I wouldn't want people doing that to me, so why was I doing it? Better yet, I work in social media, so how was I so deluded into thinking that this was okay?

My best answer is simply  one word: enthusiasm. It's hard to gauge how much is too when you're excessively excited about something. Not everyone will want to hear about your passions 24/7. That doesn't mean they don't want to hear it, just that they want it in moderation. Keep your readers in mind and just consider: how pissed would you be if someone blew up your feed with all the content you are producing?

From Tom Boy to Tweezers

On the day that I was left alone in office and was tasked with compiling the components of a proposal into a succinct and elegant binder, I quite literally ran to Panera to grab a sandwich for lunch before the big push was going to happen. As I was waiting in line, cursing the skies that I happened to come during the lunch rush, this petite blond girl told me the color of my dress (coral) was very in season (the middle of a Southern Virginia summer), and complimented my skin tone (flushed and sweaty from the jog over to get a sandwich). Then she asked me to enter in for a free makeover, so naturally after the plethora of compliments I had just received, I half-assed an entry and put just my name and number in. A few weeks passed and I got a phone call from the petite blond girl telling me I won. My life at this point was nothing short of a clusterfuck. Most days I couldn't tell you which way way up, so when she asked me to give her a date and time that worked, it was a miracle that I even picked a day of the week that I was free.  So then my friend and I embarked on an adventure that led me to make some very spontaneous decisions.

We rolled up a few minutes late to our free makeover, and were soon welcomed by the petite blond girl, who showered us with compliments, free drinks, and promise of cookies. Then we went into a mecca of makeup, in which she had an entire room full of product and pink, and spent about 2 hours smothering our faces in a myriad of products. By the end of the seminar and $100 later, I had somehow decided that selling makeup was going to be my new part-time job.

When I called my mother to tell her about it, she laughed.

When I called my sister to tell her about it, she laughed.

When I told a few of my close friends about it, they laughed.

Why was this new part-time job so funny? Probably because I had grown up playing sports, started wearing makeup my senior year of high school (let me clarify when I say "wearing makeup" I just mean mascara and eyeliner), and was basically a bro. So what I had never applied an entire face of makeup? And who cares that I can't put eyeshadow on myself without looking like a drag queen.

It was this reason exactly that I wanted to sell makeup (other than needing a bigger budget to maintain a somewhat reasonable lifestyle as a twenty-something respectable, yet fun, young professional). I thought that this opportunity presented itself so that I could learn how to be a lady.  In order to sell makeup, I'll need to learn how to to apply makeup, as well as consult people about what to get for themselves. Surely all this pretty girl stuff will rub off on me.

Even if this is the best it's going to get, at least now I know what the difference between foundation and bronzer is.